Here at Tubby Todd, we're all about family. You might know Shay from TikTok (@tannerandshay) where she and her late husband Tanner have shared the harrowing but hopeful story of their family over the past several years. They celebrated the birth of their beautiful baby girl in the midst of Tanner's heroic battle with cancer while millions of viewers followed along sharing support, encouragement and love. We can't help but feel inspired and in awe of this mama's resilience and love for her family. She shows what it means to cherish the simple, sweet moments of life and how to navigate times of heaviness with grace, gentleness and above all, hope. 

Hi, I’m Shay — new mom to AmyLou and widow to Tanner, who passed away this year after a brave battle with cancer. Becoming a mom brought indescribable joy, but losing Tanner so soon after made this season of life deeply bittersweet.

I share my story to honor Tanner’s memory, celebrate the love and light in my daughter, and connect with others navigating grief, motherhood, and the resilience it takes to keep going when your world feels turned upside down.

What’s one thing you want to remember about this newborn phase?

The way she rubs my chest and side while she’s eating 🤍

Fill in the blank: “Being AmyLou’s mom has taught me ____”

…how much strength and softness can live in the same heart at the same time.

Is there a favorite story of Tanner that you hope to pass on to AmyLou?

Yes —In general, how he always found ways to make people laugh, even in the hardest moments. I want AmyLou to know her dad’s humor was his superpower.

Any tips for other new mamas navigating those first few months?

Let people help. Say yes when someone offers to bring dinner or fold laundry. And remember: the dishes can wait, but those baby snuggles can’t.

What’s in your diaper bag that has been a total lifesaver?

Burp cloths. I never thought I could go through so many in one day, but they save me constantly. Also a little portable sound machine — instant calm.

What does self-care look like for you as a mom right now?

Honestly, small things — a hot shower, stepping outside for fresh air, letting myself watch a show guilt-free during a contact nap. I’m learning that self-care doesn’t have to be big to be meaningful.